Posts tagged joke

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Posted 2 days ago

When I see someone successful, I think about a situation where I kill the guy in a very violent and painful fashion. if I don’t taste success, no one else should…shut up bitch.

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Posted 2 days ago

Calcium

I hate Calcium. this idiot pops up in every inch of human body you look, doing some stuff. it’s like human body is hunted by Calcium. Ca+2 you disgusting piece of shit.

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Posted 2 days ago
the should have respected the rule of three. 1.Dont Read2. Dont Talk 3. Dont Photo it’s a waste. Zoom

the should have respected the rule of three.

1.Dont Read

2. Dont Talk

3. Dont Photo


it’s a waste.

(Source: spuandi)

via yourwantedirishbitch
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Posted 4 days ago

clean up, clean up, clean up you little crackers…

…and don’t send Brent up there.

:)))

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Posted 5 days ago

even the smallest can be used. size does not matter.

ever used your girlfriend’s boobs as a pillow? I did it all the time. it’s awesome. it’s a very nice practice for bonding too. skin to skin touching, face to face talking, heart to heart loving. also it’s neither energy consuming nor disgusting like sex. bottom line: boobs are great.

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Posted 1 week ago

sometimes I think I hate you guys but I remember instantly that I really hate you guys.

good luck following that

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Posted 2 weeks ago

so many female RDs. Boys? Men? can anyone hear me? I feel left alone

it’s not bad though :) women tend to be cleaner :) literally. I like working with clean people :)

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Posted 2 weeks ago
drunk rainbow

drunk rainbow

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Posted 2 weeks ago
me

me

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Posted 2 weeks ago

does Fart count as someones body language moves?

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Posted 3 weeks ago
When I saw this image I thought of The Game: Left 4 dead 2, swamp campaign. I don’t know why really. this shore does not look like a swamp. maybe it’s the trees. 

When I saw this image I thought of The Game: Left 4 dead 2, swamp campaign.

I don’t know why really. this shore does not look like a swamp. maybe it’s the trees. 

(Source: tidesss)

via fabricated-amity
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Posted 3 weeks ago
here. I found a picture. this is a mean turtle I told you about. go away you mean old turtle. he walks around the internet and makes fun of me. I don’t like you :((

here. I found a picture. this is a mean turtle I told you about.

go away you mean old turtle.

he walks around the internet and makes fun of me.

I don’t like you :((

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Posted 3 weeks ago

I saw a turtle once. it was making these weird faces that made me very uncomfortable. it was a mean turtle.

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Posted 3 weeks ago

you know what I call mission impossible? studying

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Posted 3 weeks ago

My miserable real life (not pretending/pretentious social media life) problem

  1. Friend: what the hell is your problem man? you're always cranky and shitty. what the fuck?
  2. Me: you see Mr. Michael Buble sings: "it's a beautiful day and I can't stop smiling". my problem is: I am never like that.
  3. Friend: OK. have ever heard of a medicine called Cocaine?